Tam Cowan & Dee 4 Life

An evening with Tam Cowan and friends took place at the Dundee Social Club on Thursday 19^th February 2004 in aid of Dee 4 Life.  This of course was the 2^nd time Tam had offered his valuable time to help Dundee in their time of need.

Dundee may well be the brunt of many of Tam’s comments on the Media, but there’s no doubting his love of the game and genuine wish for the survival of Dundee FC and to this alone he has already assisted Dee 4 Life raise £9,000 at the Caird Hall and a further £4,500 at this event.  Proving that the Dundee fans love turning up to hear his razor sharp humour as again the venue was sold out.

As Tam himself stated in his opening statement in his typical style of humour, he’s been so successful in fund raisers this would be his last event for Dundee, as he’s signed a Pre-contractual agreement with livvy for Life.

The proceedings started with a barrage of recent topical jokes as he introduced the format of the evening.  There would be 3 Dundee legends present to answer a question and answer session, this was followed by the crack.

”That’s two more than you thought you had”.

To warm the Audience up Limited Edition “Off The Ball” T-Shirts were to be given to anyone willing to tell a joke on stage.  After this the Dundee Legends were introduced to a rousing reception, Bert Slater, Cammy Fraser and Bobby Glennie.

Each player was asked what made them a Legend.  Bert Slater pointed to the crowd present and said “These people”.

Bobby Glennie said Cammy made him one and Cammy’s response was the fact he was from Fintry.  So right from the start it was known things were going to be in a very light hearted and candid mood for the night.

The answers were all open and frank viewpoints, though will be skirted over to save any recriminations from those who may not have a similar viewpoint.

The questions could be on any topic so needless to say a few were asked regarding Bobby Glennie’s sexual conquests during his 15 years at Dens.  He said “I better not say as I think some might be here tonight”.

Cammy was asked about his famous V sign to the Rangers fans.  Let’s just say he was as full of remorse as Neil Lennon probably was when he gave the gesture to the Dundee fans recently.

Bert was asked what it felt like replacing Pat Liney after he’d just played such a great Season.  Bert could sympathise with Pat as he’d just been in a similar situation with Liverpool who’d just been promoted to the English 1^st Division.  It was his ambition to play in the English 1^st Division.  Though Bill Shankly had decided he wouldn’t be good enough to play in the 1^st Division, but he would be good enough to play for the Champions of Scotland.  He wasn’t happy about it, but it was forced on him.  It turned out to be the greatest move he ever made.  There was a lot of pressure on him as he was the only change to the Championship winning side.  He felt he’d proved to himself he was good enough, but did feel for Pat and wished it hadn’t happened to him the way it did as they’d become friends.

Next question was what was the best games the Legends had played for Dundee.  Bert’s was the 4-1 win in Anderlecht.

Bobby was asked next by Tam which was the one game he felt he never made a complete C**t of himself.  Bobby talked us through his goal against Aberdeen where he said he picked up the ball just inside our half as he was talking to Mark McGhee at the time.  He just hit it and it flew in.

Cammy Fraser’s was against Kilmarnock when he received a ball back from Eric Sinclair and he hit the ball like a missile and it flew into the back stanchion.  He reckons the Groundsman had to get a ladder out with a sledge hammer to dislodge the ball.

Jim Duffy then highlighted the fact Bert Slater had part of one of his ears missing and asked how this came to happen.

Bert reminded us of the night when we beat Cologne 8-1 and Gillie had somehow managed to stick the ‘heid’ on their keeper to get him carried off and because there were no substitutions in those days they had to play with 10 men.

In the second leg in Germany Bert noticed there was a stretcher behind his goal and when Dundee lost the toss, they had to change ends and the stretcher bearers followed him to the other goal.  This made him a little suspicious as the two guys kept pointing at him and the stretcher, so during the game he was caught in the head by a boot and the Germans got him on the stretcher to try get him to hospital. 

Sammy Kean jumped on the stretcher with Bert on it so they couldn’t lift it and Stitches were then applied to Bert’s ear and they couldn’t find the little bit that was missing and he hoped we all believed that story.

Tam quick as a flash in his ‘This is your life voice’ said "Well Bert you haven’t seen that bit of your ear in 40 years well..........."!

The next question was to Bobby Glennie asking him if he would reopen the Nelson Bar on the Hulltoon as there hadn’t been a decent pint there since it closed down 15 years ago.

Bobby’s answer was “me reopen the Nelson, for F*** sake I needed Ghurkha’s on the door the last time I had that, it was mental”.

The next question was to Cammy Fraser and it was what was his favourite sending off in your career.  Tam reminded Cammy that the Social Club was only open to half eleven at that point.

He recalled tackling a Celtic player pretty high after he’d been giving Tosh a hard time.  Tam asked the person that put the question if that was the game he was thinking of.  He said yes it was and he remembered it was against Proven.  Cammy quick as a flash said “no it was not Proven when it went to Court” to loud laughter from the audience.

The topic of Non Scots being allowed to play for the National side was also put to the panel and the feeling in the whole room was unanimous that this shouldn’t be allowed, as there was plenty home grown talent in our game and they should not have the opportunity taken from them to strive to play for Scotland.  It was also felt that the talent that still played in Scotland was overlooked for those playing in the English lower Divisions, some of which it’s deemed are no better than what play in the Scottish leagues.

Bert Slater did suggest if they wished to pick Foreigner’s then just bring back the English league v Scottish league select matches, but he doubted if an Englishman would get a game.

Jim Duffy asked Tam Cowan since he was looking a lot slimmer and healthier if he’d contemplate playing in a celebrity match at the end of the Season at dens in aid of Dee 4 Life. 

Tam quick as ever said “I can do better than that the way things are going I could turn out for Dundee”.

The next question every fan was interested in was who were the best referees in the view of the Panel. 

The consensus was that Brian McGinley was probably the best along with the Hope brothers.

Bert Slater believed that there was a better mutual respect years ago, it looks more like us and them now a days.  He did say that however their job is very difficult as he used to referee the practice games and all his decisions would be questioned.  Rab Shannan just hated all referees and would kick him in practice games.

He feels that they could put a better pleasant face on what they do.

Jim Duffy gave his honest views on referees too regarding his opinion about good and bad referees, but they will remain censored so as not to cause any offence or bias towards us from certain individuals, though he did stipulate humorously he’d like to have Stevie Wonder for crucial games since he’d get a lot of the decisions right.

The panel were then asked who were the best players, they’d played with or been on the park against.

Bert said without a doubt it would be Gordon Smith a Player who’d won the Championship with 3 different teams and none were Celtic or Rangers.

Bobby said apart from himself he’d say Billy Pirie.  The most skilful player would be Jimmy Murphy.

Cammy felt best ever player he played with was Ally McCoist just through his scoring ability.  The best player he played against was Liam Brady when Rangers played Inter Milan.  He couldn’t get near the ball and Liam would only use his left foot.  He wished he’d use his right foot just to give him a chance, he was just such a good player.

Jim Duffy felt the best player he’s played against was Davie Cooper a genius on the ball and joy to watch.  It all depended on which era you were in. 

When at Dundee there were a lot of good players, such as Wright and Coyne.  Great players together as they complemented each other, maybe not so good when on their own.  Dundee always had good players in his era, but it was just unfortunate there would just be maybe one or two players missing to complete the jigsaw.

Another great player Jim felt was Charlie Nicholas, probably the best natural talent Scotland had produced in the past 20 years.  He also thought Chic Charnley was a great player one of the best passers of a ball in the game, ok he was probably sent off more times than Cammy, Bobby and me put together.  He was an absolute lunatic, but a great passer of the ball.  One of the great entertainers in the game and it could do with more like him.

The subject went onto worst players people had played with and some wag said missing out Vince Mennie.  Bobby said “Vince wasn’t that bad, ok he did get Forfar deducted 3 points and me the sack”.

Tam turned to Cammy and said  “There must have been some crackers during your time at Rangers”. 

Cammy said “I wouldn’t know I spent two years in the reserves”. 

Tam goes “That’s shocking you couldn’t even make that side”.

The topic then went into wages and Cammy wouldn’t divulge what he was paid by Rangers, he’d been offered an extra £5 a week by Dundee, but did say there was a pay scale introduced at Dundee by Donald MacKay of £120.  If you were OK you got £130, if you were decent you got £140, if you were very good you got £150.

I knocked on Donald’s door and said you can’t decide how good you think we are every week.  Donald said it doesn’t matter to you you’ll be on £150 every week.  Bobby never knew that he only got £120 every week his shopping was £110 a week.

Bert Slater when at Liverpool by law was only allowed to be paid £25 per week.  £2 for a win and £1 for a draw.  His first game was against Hearts during the new wage structure in Scottish Football.  He was on £35 to £40 per week but when we beat Hearts there was £100 in every players shoes that played.  He’d never seen so much money.  Tam asked what a tradesman was probably earning in those days, it was about £10 per week.

Tam said “You flash c**t that you are”, Bert's quick retort was “You’ve got to remember I’ve been a Slater all my life”.

The next question was who had the biggest ego when they all played.

Bert said it had to be Alex Hamilton.  He'd never let the Anderlecht left winger get a kick of the ball the whole game and he never stopped saying to the Belgian guy the whole game don't you think I'm a good player.

Bobby said if you want to talk about ego's, talk about this guy here pointing at Cammy.  We were both playing with Raith near the end of our careers against Meadowbank Thistle.  John McGahey was diving in as Cammy was taking the Mickey the whole first half.  5 minutes into the second half and Cammy was going to play the ball up the line McGahey dived in again, Cammy waited until he got up and chipped it back to the goalkeeper.  Cammy then went into his shorts and pulled out a hamlet and asked McGahey have you got a light?  Now there was an ego.

Jim Duffy finds the whole current problem Dundee are in as very humbling seeing Dee 4 Life and the fans fighting to keep the Club alive, as he feels the people of Dundee as a whole want to keep the club alive also. 

"I wasn't born in Dundee or brought up a Dundee fan, but I am a Dundee fan".  He enjoys the fact people of Dundee are interested in Football because of the football rather than anything outside of Football.  This brought out a large applause from the whole audience.

The last question to be put to the panel was what was their favourite Derby games.

Cammy was unfortunate enough to never be on a winning side in a Derby in the 4 years he was at Dens, but remembered the Tennent's 6's well.

Luggy and Co. used to call Dundee the Pub side and they used to have to share the bus to Coasters Arena in Falkirk for the 6's.  Both teams reached the semi Final of the Competition and were drawn together.  We went 1-0 down and thought here we go again, but managed to win 4-2.  We were celebrating in the dressing room and had to share the bus home.  There was a crate of Tennent's left in each dressing room, so when we got on the bus Jim Mclean told them they were not allowed to drink.  We got on the bus and took their case as well saying you got beat by a pub team and proceeded to drink all their beer too.  Incidentally we lost the final the next night.

Bobby recalled the game against United at Tannadice when Dundee hammered them 4-3 as one he remembered fondly, but it never really mattered what they were like as long as you won them.  He also recalled a game where Dundee were winning 1-0 with 4 minutes to go and he scored one of his own goals at the Dundee end.

I was getting pelters from the fans and looked up to see one of my own brothers giving me hell.

Bert believes he was on more winning Derby sides than he lost, but he remembers his first game against United.  Hammy had told me if Gordon Smith comes back for the ball on the edge of the box just give it to him he'll take it up field so Gordon would come back and shout for it.

This one time I gave him the ball and he lost it.  I had to pull the guy down for a penalty.  At half time Bob Shankly was going off his head at me.  I can't believe you gave the ball to him he had two men on him.  I said "Gordon tell him you shouted for it. Gordon tell him, did you shout for it, Gordon, Gordon, GORDON and until this day he never admitted to shouting for it".

Tam thanked the Panel for the evening who received loud applause.  It was then time for the Auction and raffle.