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The Gurdjieff Work
When I was young I felt clearly and with joy the force that breaks the bud onto the bough. I never wondered how this came to be and in time the taste became pale and rare but I never thought about it. At some time later this became a question disguised in various other forms and still not attended too much, until something inside me was compelled to move on its behalf and eventually I encountered the Gurdjieff work.
It may be that many of us are seeking answers to questions of some kind, something along the lines of meaning and purpose, but before reading on I would ask you to consider how satisfying your current picture of yourself is. If it meets all of your needs and wishes, or even if all it requires is a little tidying here and there, what follows will do little for your self-esteem, but it may arouse your curiosity ..... or maybe not.
One of the central ideas of the Gurdjieff Work is that people, especially in contemporary western society are, in every sense of the word, mechanical. This statement immediately rankles with our sense of pride as individuals, and the temptation to laugh it off or refute it with myriad examples to the contrary jumps quickly to our defence. If, however, we can for a minute suspend disbelief, and put this assertion alongside the question of how and what decides the course of our individual lives, we may come to the possibility of another conclusion.
Many people, when considering how their lives have unfolded say that major twists and turns just happened. P D Ouspensky wrote a short novel in the 1920's under the title of "The Strange Life of Ivan Osokin". The subject of the book finds himself in a mid-life crisis, having, in his eyes, made mistakes at key points of his life which have cost him his happiness. By chance he meets a magician to whom he explains his woes. Osokin argues that things would be different if only he could have the same chances over again, and (with the benefit of foresight) he would be able to keep, instead of lose, his lifetime love. The magician sends him back to live his life again. Yet even with this foresight, and in full cognisance of what will ensue from his actions, he behaves, second time around, in exactly the same way (as the magician had warned him). The underlying current of the book is that we do not live life, but rather, that life lives us. It is worth considering our response to this assertion that all of our thoughts, feelings and actions are in fact, mechanical. Does it seem absurd, offensive, or could you countenance it? Maybe those feelings that we get when life seems like a dream are a shadow of some deeper realization.
Have you ever caught yourself changing one deep-rooted conviction for another or feeling completely the opposite emotion about a person for whom you had a different regard yesterday. Did this reaction result from a conscious wish? According to Gurdjieff, what we regard as "I" is in fact constantly changing within us and is nothing more than a transient part of us called to the surface by some external factor or chance association within. When we say "I" it is a different person each time. Our "individuality" consists of hundreds of different "I's" which change from hour to hour or even minute by minute on the basis of accidental external influences. These I's are, to all intents and purposes, different people within us. |