AT LAST - the rain had stopped falling, the sun was out, however experienced hashers knew that there was a slight possibility of a little shiggy on the route after 3 or more months of torrential rain.

 

The day started with Navigator arriving 1 hour early only to find the 2 hares Geoff & Martin hurriedly re-routing the very first leg of the Hash - apparently the original route was flooded (more about this later).

 

So as 12 o'clock arrived, Mishap was inundated with work trying to get the Hash Cash from over 40 happy smiling hashers & potential hashers, there were many virgins who had never been on a Hash & many of us were slightly worried as several seemed to have arrived in their Sunday best!

 

As this was the 70th year of Hashing, Geoff gave a brief history of hashing, giving several examples of the types of terrain that international hashers have to put up with. We were later to find that all of these examples had cunningly been incorporated into this Hash. We now know why on the Shirley Hash Info page there was the reference to 'Indiana Jones Escapes From Africa'. The clues were there!

After Martin did the Hash Circle showing all of the flour markings, the Hash started, rather unusually by just being pointed in the right direction. Geoff started late as he was trying to help Unhinged (who does 3, 4 or even 5 hashes a week), he had forgotten his shorts & didn't want to do it in his best trousers!

 

The start was nice & flat along the canal towpath with lots of puddles, however this didn't last long as the trail was diverted sharply to the left down a near vertical drop with what seemed like petrified tree roots & branches, Mishap later suggested that the only way to have made it steeper was to abseil down the side of the aqueduct. A quick sprint under the aqueduct, round the corner & into a field for the first re-group, put there just to ensure that no one had been run over on the dangerous road.

 

Now it was all open country side in front of us, when the trail was found, cunningly directed across a small stream (in a normal summer), Mishap was the first to paddle across in the process being the first to qualify for a 'Shiggy Spot Prize', it would be a couple of hours before anyone knew what these were. A run up an open field strangely with a lonely stile in the middle of it with no adjoining fences.

The paths continued through fields, dropping down a set of steps into another field, which happened to be Berry Mound a pre historic hill fort. we did not get around this section too quickly as there were many horses on it, eventually got out of the the fort to a re-group & a photo opportunity, at this point Geoff was going to tell us all about Berry Mound, unfortunately we were moved on by the land owner saying that this was not a true foot path (TIP FOR HARES - when you plan a route NEVER just take the word of horse feeding dog walking individuals as gospel - find a verified land owner & confirm the route!).

 

So to avoid further conflict the Hares pointed us directly down the correct trail, luckily for the ladies as this was a ladies check & according to Geoff at least 1 of the trails was extremely shiggy!

 

So it was now out of this horsey area & over a stile into an uphill section with a sneaky fishook right at the top. Thankfully it all levelled out again so the speed merchant (FRB's) noticeably Tomina could sprint ahead only to be running in the opposite direction looking at the faces of the slower runners - yes more fishooks!

 

Then at a Re-Group just after a fishook, some thing strange appeared - an oasis - in a prize winning garden there was an extremely smart waiter was there ready to serve us drinks! That was Dave (now an Honorary BH3 non-running member) who looked after all of the hashers with refreshments (sorry no alcohol on this one). the FRB's were so close to it but didn't see it until most of the pack had got in there first. There was lots of chatting, drinking & giggles going on with curious neighbours wondering what the commotion was in their quiet little road.

Any way you've had your rest so lets get on with the Hash!

 

Onwards over a road, where a couple of the walkers took the slightly short cut to the next section & one youngster & mum took the full short cut back to the pub.

 

Down paths through fields (& more horses) onto a road with yet another fishook, the next obstacle we came across was a ford. the hares had cunningly blobbed the left hand side of the road & well blobbed the opposite side of the ford which took the front runners focus away from the unlined footbridge that spanned the ford on the right hand side of the road. A miraculous thing happened the front runners (Mishap again) went straight through the ford & the majority of the hashers followed. the ones who went over the foot bridge unceremoniously had water kicked at them by Navigator(unfortunately Geoff's camera didn't work so the evidence has been lost )who was standing in the middle of the ford. It was at this point that the hares realised that they need not have re-routed the start of the hash - hasher enjoy getting wet!

 

After a long queue all of the pack managed to get over the gate, across the next field to be greeted by the second gate that we had been warned about, however we had not been warned about the barbed wire that was being fixed above the gate! Geoff had to go to the front to negotiate a safe passage beyond the gate (TIP FOR HARES - when you negotiate rights of passage with landowners, do it the week before the hash NOT the month before).

 

Eventually we all clambered over another gate after the barbed wire had been pulled out of the way, the new tenants of the field were not best pleased (understandably so), we followed the trail into yet another field, however there was a flour sign on the ground - ON HOME - with an arrow pointing directly across the canal where we could see another sign - BH3 On Home!

 

Surely the Hares cannot want us to wade across a canal - can they? There were several discussions going on trying to decide how deep the water needs to be in a canal to allow boats a safe passage, then someone spotted a big Brass Bell hanging on a tree (yes in the middle of nowhere!) with a notice saying 'BH3 Ring The Bell'. What the heck - ring it, the hash cannot get any more surreal can it?

 

YES it can! Once the bell had been rung, we turned from watching the rest of the weary pack crossing the previous field, to looking down the canal where we could see a small white boat being rowed towards us, there was a lot of gasps of disbelief which hit a crescendo when it was realised that the person rowing was actually a singing drunken pirate Yes you read it correctly.

He said if you plied him with some beer he would take us to the other side of the canal so that finally we could - ON HOME! During the Down Downs the pirate was revealed - it was Pete (a plasterer not a pirate) he became our second Honorary BH3 non-running member.

Finally all was sorted & procession of weary hashers were ferried across the canal to continue there journey On Home. Apparently the Hares had planned the crossing so that there would be a stagger in people getting to the bar to alleviate any queue, unfortunately the first couple of dozen of the pack just stood on the tow path chatting.

 

It was also noted that the name of the boat was Navigator, so the moral of this story is without Navigator - none of us would have got home! 

Now for the Down Downs:

BH3's RA, Mishap, administered an exceptionally large number of down downs.

The hares Geoff and Martin got a well deserved down down each for setting a spectacular, unforgettable route, which included mountaineering, bog hopping, avoiding wild animals including the odd elephant and nautical challenges.  An excellent turnout on a remarkably dry sunny September day meant that the Shirley hash was a success!  Geoff was also noted for demonstrating excellently what to do after you have checked and check - rub out the circle in the right direction.  Unfortunately, he did this at the first regroup check before anyone had checked - blatantly pointing the right direction out to all present!

 

With 20 or so newcomers, plenty of down downs were given to the hash virgins.  Most had heard about BH3 through the local media or word of mouth (both courtesy of Geoff), some booked through Spice Birmingham and others had seen the website.  Fantastic to see so many new faces, hope more than a few will come back on future hashes!

 

Martin's mate Dave got a down down for being a 'Maitre De' and providing half way refreshments. His other pal, Pete, got one for being the pirate that ferried weary hashers across the canal at the end of the trail, in a boat named 'Navigator'.  The landlady of the Drawbridge Inn, Karen, got one of the 40 down downs for being a good sport and not complaining about us using up the entire stock of half pint glasses.

  

Chris got one for a bit of bare faced cheek when she accidently flashed whilst getting changed in the On Inn car park.  Although the sun was shining, it wasn't quite up to the conditions on the Greek holiday she and Steve had been on...and there are no beaches in Shirley!

Ripper got one for shouting 'On on!' and promptly falling over.  Tweeny got one for managing to play the horn all the way to the end instead of running out of puff.  Ironically he wasn't running as much and was renamed (see below).

 

Hermaphrodite got one for ironing a t-shirt to wear on the hash and Mona Lena got one for wearing it until Tweeny made her change!

 

Kath (Price) got one for coming prepared for the shiggy by wearing the best pair or wellies around - lilac coloured!  Unhinged got one for forgetting his shorts after hashing all week and being geographically challenged by walking the wrong way towards Stratford instead of towards the On Inn (the beer compass was playing up).

 

Hash Namings

BH3's GM, Navigator, named Tweeny's "No Puff" for his ability to play the hash horn only half way round the trail.  Mandy was named "Muffler" for accidently muffling the muffle of Tweeny's horn with her bosom, on the previous hash at Sutton Park.