Thanks to....

Charlie 'McBane, Rod master, ah've nae magazines' Smy

Marty 'Jailbait, hawdin back the videos' Johnstone

Gordon 'What Colour is that?' Hughes

Davie 'I'm nippin awa at 2 acloak' Broon

Davy 'Say hello to the 32 panel leather orb' Watson

James 'Gees ma tenner Davie' Anderson

Graeme 'Kelly-anne is a nice girl' McHarry

Jimbo 'am gaggin' fur a shoat a Jailbaits dex...not' Haggarty

Mark 'Kinky, ah'm skint, ah'm tired, a hate wurk' McKerracher

But a want a £2000 telly

Stevie 'aw naw...I'll no beat ye at fitba (ya bugger) Grant'

Mark 'I am the UDV PEEEEENNNNNNIIIIIISSSSSSSSS' Crawley

(no pics - we're british)

Dennis 'Bracket-master' Barclay

Ian 'coal boy' Urie

Kevin 'A don't give a monkeys cos am aff the morra' Hall

Danny 'ma wife hates you, G' Cowie

(she thinks you're a toss)

and finally...

Melinky

Shanny

and

Thomas