this week we are indifferent to REEF.

fronted by peter stringfellow, the group originally started out providing the music for yugoslavian art house cinema soundtracks. their first minor hit came in 1982. entitled "haaaark, the heraaaaald angeeeellls siing", it was a slowed down version of the classic hymn, lasting 4 days, 9 hours, and 37 minutes. it peaked at number 67 and sparked off a national tour.

in the early 90s they moved to the uk, and after spending all their savings on making an album audible only to cats, they found themselves in dire financial difficulty. their solution was to hook up 57 zx spectrums together and write a revolutionary computer programme to blend early 70s rawk music with mid 90s pop sensibilities.

the next step of their plan was to murder tv host and dj chris evans, and have him replaced with a body double, who would promote their songs. meanwhile, unable to perfect the growling voice required by their new songs, peter stringfellow slashed his own throat. it worked brilliantly.

the resulting album spawned three hit singles - most notably "place your hands". the subliminal messages in this song prompted a series of sex crimes, mass murders and the eventual nuclear destruction of australia.

peter stringfellow has since left reef and retired from the music business, now spending most of his time getting into fights with leeds united fans.