Dear Gifford, i have a recurring dream
that i'm david usher and i'm being
chased by paul wilcox and his drum sticks
what should i do
i wake up in a cold sweat every night
please help? Anon
Well this sounds like a classic case of
david usher sympathy syndrome
every dave fan goes through this you are
obviously worried that one day
jeff, mark and kevin might actually
get him back by some how inciting/bribing
paul into evacting revenge on dave for
all the abuse and take their revenge
you should just come to terms with this
and realize that one day dave may get his
come uppence and pay for his crimes against
innocent band members.
do you suffer from moist disillusionment this can be in any of the following forms:
a) the insistence that dave is completely
innocent of all incidents involving band member abuse.
b) the insistence that paul is completely
innocent of any and all drumstick related incidents.
c) the insistence that moist aren't the
best band on the planet (come on you KNOW your wrong).
d) the insistence that stan (yeah i know
stans gone but i just can't let go) is
innocent of any and all incidents involving
flash lights.
e) the insistence that dave isn't an alien
probe (for full explanation go here).
f) the insistence that jeff isn't one
of satan's little helpers.
Dear Gifford, i have a recurring dream involving mark makoway and some jam please help
don't worry you'll get over it. just tell
yourself mark is married and
therefore unavailable for any ahem jam
related stuff.