Hugo Weaving, Web Weaving: The Kiss Review
 
Hugo Weaving, The Kiss, Fence, big ends
 

n.  Hugo Weaving ~ The Kiss

AU Short Film 2000   6 1/2 minutes  Hugo Weaving Content: appx 45%
Barry ~ gay neighbour,  king of surbuban double-entendres
Cast: Hugo Weaving    Barry, Zoe Carrides    Sue, Peter Brown    Bob
Dir & Wri:  Alan Lovell 
 

Hugo Weaving: The Kiss Plot/Comments:

This is a short film, shot on a tighter-than-tight budget, about sexual miscommunication.
     Sue has arranged a Big Night of Passion with Bob: local DJ (and next door neighbour) Barry is playing their special swank song; Sue is ready and willing in a silk camisole and a smile; and Bob…is totally knackered after another hard day playing with his big engine (of the Chrysler Valiant kind).
              With another opportunity for sex squashed (Sue: "If we don't do it soon, I'm going to forget what it looks like"; Bob: "I'm out of gas"), Sue exhorts a promise from Bob to perform his duty first thing in the morning…only to awaken to an empty bed and the sound of an engine choking.
 
As Bob grows more impatient with the car, neighbour Barry (Hugo Weaving) watches admiringly from over the fence, with the kind of blissful, undisguised lust usually reserved for teenagers with crushes. However, Barry, who is an ex-mechanic, has a good excuse to get closer to Bob, happily getting his tools and taking the opportunity to engage in some flirtatious banter. 
     While this is initially deliberately ignored by the blokey Bob, Barry is so obvious in his attraction for him that as they lean in to check out Bob's engine, the semi- awkward, sexually-tense atmosphere becomes more obvious.
Hugo Weaving, The Kiss, head job
Hugo Weaving, The Kiss, overall miscommunication
 
From this point on, the farce gathers momentum: Barry puts on Bob's overalls and gets under the car; Bob locks himself in the bathroom for a thorough going over, alone with his car manual; and Sue, seeing the overalled legs poking out from beneath the car, is determined that she will have some kind of sex life, sticking her Nicorette gum on the car and unzipping the fly of 'Bob's' overalls to go down on him.
     The film repeatedly cuts from Barry's unexpected but very welcome and vocal sexual relief (which he thinks is from Bob); Sue cheerfully getting her way with what she thinks is Bob; and Bob brushing his teeth with an increasingly frantic rhythm as he nears completion of his rousing chapter on Chrysler Valiant engines.
 
A job well done, Sue leaves a Post-It note on the car ('my turn tonight') which naturally blows away. 
     A more relaxed Bob returns to a shaken but smiling Barry emerging from beneath his car. More auto-sexual miscommunication ensues, with Bob unknowingly praising Barry's "nice unit" as "smooth as silk", confirming that Sue won't get jealous, and agreeing to Barry's offer to have a reciprocal go himself.
    As this last piece of miscommunication is spoken (with Barry happily checking out Bob), the camera zooms in on Sue's large piece of Nicorette that has been left on the car and Bob begins to realize what has happened.
 
The Kiss Gallery
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Web Weaving
 
 

Typical Hugo Weaving Quotes:

  • "I've pulled out more big ends than Julian Clary"
  • Bob: "Do you reckon it might need a head job?"                                      Barry: "Yeah…[pause. Barry leans in, smiling, nose about an inch away from Bob's]…well, could do with one myself" [pause. Barry continues to smile, moving imperceptibly closer]
  • Post-coital miscommunication:    Bob: "What's the verdict?"          Barry [surprised, slightly shaken  but smiling broadly]: "Wonderful"                                        Bob: [oblivious, talking about the car] It's a nice unit. Smooth as silk.                                               Barry: What's your wife think?    Bob: She doesn't give a toss. I mean, what does she know about it?                                                Barry: [smiling expectantly]: You want me to have a go?                Bob: Yeah, [sees the lump of Sue's Nicorette gum on the car] yeah sure. [slightly puzzled] Go if you like.                                                 [Barry is checking out Bob, Bob is only focussed on the lump of gum and it dawns on him what has happened]


n. Screen shots taken with much gratitude from the Deirty Girls group. Thanks heaps to Avium for making it possible to watch the RP file.

 
Hugo Weaving, The Kiss, have a go
 
Coming in at just over 6 minutes and shot on video, the budget is obviously minimal and the film itself is certainly never subtle. However The Kiss is a funny, believable, well-observed and well set-up surburban farce.
Hugo Weaving, The Kiss, tools
 

Hugo Weaving content: 

Another gay part (see also Naked: Stories of Men, Priscillaand Bedrooms and Hallways), Barry is never camp but always smoothly, smilingly, quietly confident in his overt flirting.
 
Shot aroundThe Lord of the Rings , The Kiss is a good example of Hugo Weaving's support for a growing film industry. Despite his status, he has repeatedly worked on tiny projects and shorts, either because of friends, itchy creative feet, or a desire to support new film-makers (he initially worked with long-time collaborator Stavros Kazantzidis/Efthymiou on his film school short Road to Alice ).