Weird Al Yankovic
Lyrics for "Weird Al" Yankovic
 
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"Ricky"


(Parody of "Mickey" by Toni Basil)

Lyrics:

R: Hey Lucy, I'm home

L: Oh Ricky, you're so fine
L: You're so fine you blow my mind
L: Hey Ricky, hey Ricky

R: Oh Lucy, you're so fine
R: You're so fine you blow my mind
R: Hey Lucy, hey Lucy

L: Oh Ricky, you're so fine
L: You play your bongos all the time
L: Hey Ricky, hey Ricky

R: Oh Lucy, you're so fine
R: How I love tyo hear you whine
R: Hey Lucy

L: Hey Ricky
L: You always play your conga drums, you think you got the right
L: You wake up little Ricky in the middle of the night
L: Stop shakin' your maraccas now and just turn out the light Ricky

R: I'm sick of Fred and Ethel always comin' over here
R: 'Cause Fred eats all our pretzel sticks and then he spills his beer
R: Why don't you serve your cassarole and make them disappear Lucy

L: Oh Ricky, what's a girl like me supposed to do
L: You really drive me wild when you sing your babaloo
R: Oh Lucy, you're so dizzy, don't you have a clue
R: Well, here's to you Lucy
R: I love you too Lucy, too Lucy, let's babaloo Lucy

L: Hey Ricky
L: You're always playin' at the club, you never let me go
L: I'm beggin' and I'm pleadin' but you always tell me no
L: Oh, please honey please, let me be in your show Ricky, wah

R: You always burn the roast and you drop the dishes too
R: You iron my new shirt and you burn a hole right through
R: You're such a crazy redhead I just don't know what to do Lucy

L: Oh Ricky
L: What a pity, don't you understand
L: That every day's a rerun and the laughter's always canned
R: Oh Lucy
R: I'm the latin leader of the band
R: So here's to you Lucy
R: Let's babaloo Lucy, too Lucy
R: Everybody rumba!

R: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha



"Gotta Boggie"


Lyrics:

Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie
Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can't shake it off

Well, I went out to a party just the other night
I was jammin' to the music, I was feelin' alright
I was burning up the floor like a disco maniac
When my woman said, "Baby, why's your hand behind you back?"

Gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
I said boogie (gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can't shake it off

I can't pick it off (uh uh)
I can't flick it off (uh uh)
I sure ain't gonna lick it off (oh no)
So I guess I'm gonna have to learn to live with it

I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he's gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he's gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie (gotta boogie, uh huh, he's gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can't shake it off

(boogie)
Gotta boogie
(boogie)

Hey, you wanna boogie? (No man, I don't wanna boogie)
Wanna boogie? (Get that boogie out of my face)
Do any of you wanna boogie? (No!)

Gotta boogie on my finger
Gotta boogie on my finger
Gotta boogie on my finger and I can't shake it off



" I Love Rocky Road"


(Parody of "I Love Rock & Roll" by Heartbreakers)

Lyrics:

I hear those ice cream bells and I start to drool
Keep a couple quarts in my locker at school
Yah, but chocolate's gettin' old
Vanilla just leaves me cold

There's just one flavor good enough for me, yah me
Don't gimme no crummy taste spoon
I know what I need

Baby, I love rocky road
So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me, ow

They tell me ice cream junkies are all the same
All the soda jerkers know my name
When their supple is gone
Then I'll be movin' on

But I'll be back on Monday afternoon, you'll see
Another truck load's comin' in for me, all for me
I'm singin'

I love rocky road
So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me, ow

(oh, make it talk)

When I'm all alone, I just grab myself a cone
And if I get fat and loose my teeth that's fine with me
Just lock me in the freezer and throw away the key
Sing it

I love rocky road
So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me

I love rocky road
So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with

*I love rocky road
*So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
*I love rocky road
*So have another triple scoop with

*I love rocky road
*So weren't you gonna buy half a gallon, baby
*I love rocky road
*So have another triple scoop with me



"Buckingham Blues"


(Parody of "Jack & Diane" by John Cougar Mellencamp)

Lyrics:

Gonna tell you a story
About Chuck and Diane
Couple British kids from
The palace at Buckingham

Chuckie wants to grow up
And be a polo star
And ride his little horsies
All around the backyard, oh yeah

You know they really paid their dues
I said hey, lawdy mama
They got them Buckingham blues

Now Chuckie goes hunting
And leaves Diane alone
So she fixes her hair
And she talks on the Princess Phone

Chuckie's still tryin' to figure out
What his job's supposed to be
And Diane's the fashion leader
Of the aristocracy

I said hey, Lady Di
Tell me where'd you get them shoes, ah
Well, hey nonny nonny
Looks like you got them Buckingham blues

Aw, bein' heir to the throne, well
It must be awful hard
Gotta pose for pictures
Out on the front yard

And Lady Di, well
She must have it pretty rough
Gotta hang around the house all day
Makin' babies and stuff

Another game of croquet
Then they're off on a Caribbean cruise
Well hey bop-a-re-bop
They really got them Buckingham blues

Ah, tell the truth, now, tell the truth
Wow

I got my mojo workin'
yeah, woo, don't help me now
Ah, hurt me mama, whoa, ah

They don't serve no Twinkies
With their afternoon tea
Never had a dinner
Made by Chef Boyardee

Bein' in the spotlight
Is a hard life to choose
Diane drops half a pound
It's on the six o'clock news, oh yeah

Those kids have really paid their dues
Oh, what a royal pain it is
When you got them Buckingham blues



"Happy Birthday"


Lyrics:

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

Well, it's time to celebrate your birthday, it happens every year
We'll eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lot of beer
You should be good and happy that there's something you can eat
A million npeople every day are starving in the street

Your daddy's in the gutter with the wretched and the poor
Your mama's in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four
There's garbage in the water
There's poison in the sky
I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

Well, what's the matter little friend, you think this party is the pits
Enjoy it while you can, we'll soon be blown to bits
The monkeys in the pentagon are gonna cook our goose
Their finger's on the button, all they need it an excuse

It doesn't take a military genius to see
We'll all be crispy critters after World War III
There's nowhere you can run to, nowhere you can hide
When they drop the big one, we all get fried

(Come on boys and girls, sing along, ok?)

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
wow! (background screaming, sound effect)

Well there's a punk in the alley and he's looking for a fight
There's an Arab on the corner buying everything in sight
There's a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed
Seems that everywhere you look today there's misery and greed

I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun
But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun
So if you think it's scary, if it's more than you can take
Just blow out the candles and have a piece of cake

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
wow!

Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday
Happy birthday to you

(Happy Birthday!)

And a pinch to grow an inch!



"Stop Draggin' My Car Around"


(Parody of "Stop Draggin' My Heart Around" by Tom Petty)


Lyrics:

Had to park my car for just five minutes
I had to go inside to use the phone
When I came back again, my car was gone, well
I didn't know it was a loading zone
What a bummer, I as so brought down
I had to chase that tow truck all over town, yellin'

Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my car around

Took my baby to the local disco
I was jumpin' like a maniac
But the owner came and pulled me off the floor
Then he took me to his little office in the back

He said, I really like your snaggletooth necklace
Your pants are groovy and your hair's okay
But, man, that car of yours is so uncool
Like wow, I'm sorry, but we towed it away

Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my car around

Now I'm at home, I'm watchin' "Gilligan's Island"
Guess it's time to trade my old car in
For twenty dollars and my '64 Plymouth
Maybe I could get a second-hand Schwinn

Look out the window, there's a
Tow truck in the driveway
I grabbed the driver and I asked him why
He said, I'm sorry, kid, you're late with the payments
It's time to kiss your little car goodbye

Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my
Stop draggin' my car around
Stop draggin' my car around

Listen, the check's in the mail, no really
Stop draggin' my car around
Oh man, I just had the hub caps painted
Stop draggin' my car around
Hey, hey, I left m sandwich in the back seat
Stop draggin' my car around
Oh
Stop draggin' my car around



"My Bologna"


(Parody of "My Sharona" by Knack)


Lyrics:

Ooh, my little hungry one, hungry one
Open up a package of my bologna
Ooh, I think the toast is done, the toast is done
Top it with a little of my bologna

Never gonna stop, eat it up
Such a tasty snack I always eat too much, then throw up
But I'll soon be back for my, my, my, yi, yi, woo
M-m-m-my bologna

Spreadin' on the mustard now, show me how
Spread it on a litle of this bologna
Hopin' that we don't run out, don't run out
If we do I'm sure that I'll miss bologna

Never gonna stop, eat it up
Such a tasty snack I always eat too much, then throw up
But I'll soon be back for my, my, my, yi, yi, woo
M-m-m-my bologna
M-m-m-my bologna

(belch)

Goin' to the market now, market now
I'm the city's biggest bologna buyer
Walkin' down the shopping isles, shopping isles
Filling up my basket with Oscar Meyer

Never gonna stop, eat it up
Such a tasty snack I always eat too much, then throw up
But I'll soon be back for my, my, my, yi, yi, woo
M-m-m-m-m-m-m-my, my, my, yi, yi, woo
M-m-m-my bologna
M-m-m-my bologna
M-m-m-my bologna
M-m-m-my bologna



"The Check's In the Mail"


Lyrics:

Well, hey, how ya doin', have a seat, have a drink
Boy, it's good to see you, what can I say
Whoa, sorry, gotta run, we'll get together again
Say, what was your name, anyway
Well, we're workin' on the problem
We'll get back to ya soon (yeah)
But don't try to call me
I'll be in a meeting every afternoon
For a year, maybe longer, keep in touch
Thanks for droppin' by and have a nice day

The check's in the mail (hey)
You're beautiful
Don't ever change
You know what I mean
My girl will call your girl
We'll talk, we'll do lunch
Or leave a message on my machine
So baby, won't you sign
On the dotted line
I'm gonna make your dreams come true
The check's in the mail
Would I lie to you

Well, hey, wait a minute
What's the matter, hold on
You want me to fork over the loot
You say you hate my guts
You wanna take me to court
And you got yourself a lawyer with a three-piece suit
Well, I'm proud to say you're not
The only critic of mine (yeah)
So if you wanna sue me
I'm afraid you're gonna have to wait in line
Take a number, thanks for calling
Who loves you, baby
Don't forget to read the fine print

See, the check's in the mail (hey)
You're beautiful
Don't ever change
You know what I mean
My girl will call your girl
We'll talk, we'll do lunch
Or leave a message on my machine
So baby, won't you sign
On the dotted line
I'm gonna make your dreams come true
The check's in the mail
Would I lie to you

Aw, trust me

The check's in the mail (hey)
You're beautiful
Don't ever change
You know what I mean
Why don't you leave a message with my girl
I'll have lunch with your machine
So baby, won't you sign
On the dotted line
I'm gonna make your dreams come true
The check's in the mail
Would I lie to you
The check's in the mail
Would I lie to you

(giggling)




"Another One Rides the Bus"


(Parody of "Another One Bites The Dus" by Queen)

Lyrics:

Ridin' in a bus down the boulevard
And the place was pretty packed
Couldn't find a seat so I had to stand
With the perverts in the back
It was smellin' like a locker room
There was junk all over the floor
We're already packed in like sardines
But we're stoppin' to pick up more
Look out

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on
And another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey
He's gonna sit by you
Another one rides the bus

There's a suitcase pokin' me in the ribs
There's an elbow in my ear
There's a smelly old bum standin' next to me
Hasn't showered in a year
Well, I think I'm missin' a contact lens
I think my wallet's gone
And I think this bus is stoppin' again
To let a couple more freaks get on
Look out

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on
And another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey
He's gonna sit by you
Another one rides the bus

Yeah

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus, ow
Another one rides the bus, hey, hey
Another one rides the bus, hey

The window doesn't open, and the fan is broke
And my face is turnin' blue
I haven't been in a crowd like this
Since I went to see The Who
Well, I should've got off a couple miles ago
But I couldn't get to the door
There isn't any room for me to breathe
Now we're gonna pick up more, yeah

Another one rides the bus
Another one rides the bus
And another comes on
And another comes on
Another one rides the bus
Hey
He's gonna sit by you
Another one rides the bus

No
No
Huh?
Yeah
Yeah



"I'll be Mellow When I'm Dead"


Lyrics:

I don't care about your karma
I don't care about what's hip
No space cadet's gonna tell me what to do

I won't swim in your Jacuzzi
You can't make me settle down
I'd rather kick and jump and bite and scratch
And scream until I'm blue

I may as well be hyper
As long as I'm still around
'Cause I'll have lots of time to be laid back
When I'm six feet under ground

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I can't stand the smell of incense
I don't really like to jog
No Joni Mitchell eight-tracks in my car (ooh)

I hate anything organic
Even health food makes me sick
You won't catch me sipping Perrier
Down in some sushi bar

I tell you, now's the time to go for
All the gusto you can grab
You'll have plenty of time to be low key
When you're laid out on the slab

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I don't want no part of that vegetarian scene
I won't buy me a pair of designer jeans
No redwood hot tub to my name

I got all that I want
And if it's all the same to you
I don't need a course in self-awareness
To find out who I am

And I'd rather have a
Big Mac or a Jumbo Jack
Than all the bean sprouts in Japan

So don't ask me what I'm into
I don't need to prove I'm cool
I'll break your arm
If you ask me what's my sign

I won't tell you where my head's at
I don't need to see no shrink
Psychosis may be in this year
But I'm really not that kind

And I'm in no hurry to be casual
In fact I think I'll wait
Until I'm pushing up the daisies
(Like, wow, man, can you relate)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)
I'll be mellow when I'm dead (I'll be mellow when I'm dead)



"Such a Groovy Guy"


Lyrics:

I got my alligator boots, I wear my pants skin tight
I wear my dark sunglasses in the middle of the night
And when I look in the mirror, oh it's such an awesome sight
It makes me want to kneel down and pray

I'm so adorable and charming
I'm sure that you can see
And everybody's always tryin' to hang around with me
They tell me I'm the greatest, and it's hard to disagree
'Cause I'm so perfect in every way

And I'm so cute
I can hardly stand it
And I'm so handsome, honey, I could just die
I know you'll never be as wonderful as me
But at least you can try

‘Cause I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy

Baby, are you in the mood for a little romance
Well, for starters I could pour some chocolate pudding down your pants
And then attach electrodes to your brain and watch you dance
Well, golly, wouldn't that be fun

Oh, and then I might decide to tie you up with dental floss
I'll make you wear a harness, and I'll show you who's the boss
Of course, if you refuse, well honey, it's your loss
I mean, I don't do this with just anyone

So baby, how can you say its all over
So how can you tell me goodbye
So now you tell me that you're leavin' me for good
And all I wanna know is why
I mean, after all

I'm really such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy

I mean you could do worse

I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm just such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)

Baby, I tell you I'm such a groovy guy, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy, such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Such a groovy guy, such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy, such a groovy, groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
I'm really such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Such a groovy guy, I'm such a groovy guy (such a groovy guy)
Such a groovy guy (whoo)
Yeah



"Mr. Frump In the Iron Lung"


Lyrics:

I visit Mr. Frump in the hospital
I see him most every day
And when I see Mr. Frump in his iron lung
This is what I hear him say

(deep breathing)

Y'know, Mr. Frump is my very best friend
He's never a chump or a tease
He never tells me lies, and best of all
He never disagrees

I bring him candy and flowers every afternoon
Sit down by his side and say "Hi"
And then I ask him his opinion of the world situation
And I wait for Mr. Frump's reply, and Mr. Frump would say

(deep breathing)

Well, unfortunately, soon it came to be
Mr. Frump's dying day
And now I bring to you the very last thing
That Mr. Frump had to say....

(deep breathing, that fades and dies off)

Amen